Thursday 31 December 2020

Martha's Bonfire Night

 


Was it a good date? No.

But, had Martha learned something from it?

She took a big bite of her burger and sighed with her mouth full. She’d learned that dating was pointless and women who did it were stupid. That counted as a life lesson, right?

Or maybe women weren’t stupid, and it was only Martha who had such bad luck with guys. It couldn’t be normal to find this many weirdo men in such quick succession. From the one who spent the night on his phone, refusing to make eye contact and barely uttering a word, to the one who massively insulted her in French thinking she wouldn’t understand him.

It said a lot about the whole mate-search that the best date she’d been on was the one where she was stood up. That would have certainly been preferable to what she’d just experienced with the man she’d fled not two minutes ago. He was the worst of them because he was the first to make her feel bad about herself. Even the one who’d called her a ho in French, hadn’t been personal, but Jeff… His comments had stung in their thoughtlessness.

Well, screw him! At least she got a burger out of it. She’d paid for it herself and it was damn good.

It placated her temper as she made the five-minute walk from the restaurant to Garrett Park.

 Maybe she was still cursed. What if they’d misunderstood the goddess’s decree that their coven was forgiven for the atrocities committed by past members?

Martha’s coven sisters had done their best to make amends, but how could you make amends for the acts of others? How did you repent for the sins of the unforgiveable? A curse would certainly explain the string of bad dates she’d been on.

Except… the coven couldn’t be cursed. Her sister River had found her mate in Alex, a handsome, tall, toned man who saw only perfection in his mate.

Could be her sisters were forgiven but Martha wasn’t. She hadn’t done anything bad, though, to warrant being singled out with and ancient curse. Hell, she was one of the better-behaved of her immortal sisters.

There was no explanation for the men she’d had no more than a single date with. If even that.

The burger was gone long before she reached the park, but that was okay. The angry stomp of her brown boots hitting the sidewalk was soothing.

The lap she did around the muddy park, seeking out her sisters and Alex not so much, although, it did give her a chance to see what stalls were set up.

She was just about to get her cell phone out to call River and find out where they were when the fiery red of April’s hair caught her attention from the corner of her eye.

Her coven, her family, were standing by a food truck that sold soup and they were gathered together, paper cups held in their gloved and mittened hands. Or at least some of her coven were.

Bethany, April, River and River’s mate Alex. He was an honorary member. Always there to support River but with no magical abilities. He’d become one of them quicker than Martha had expected, and now he was the big brother they’d never known they wanted. Even her older sisters, those whose ages were in the hundreds were treated like annoying little sisters by Alex.

Martha crossed the park to join her family. Bethany was the first to notice her approach, and a smile spread over her heart-shaped face. Her dark hair was tucked under a grey woolly hat with a blue bobble on top. Her eyes shone behind the smudged lenses of her square glasses and she was dressed in jeans and a dark grey puffy jacket. Her Converse trainers were marked with mud and as always, a heavy camera hung on a long strap, slung over her shoulder.

“Martha!” she exclaimed, and the others turned in surprise.

“I thought you couldn’t make it,” River said.

April winced and then asked, “How was the date?”

Four pairs of attentive eyes locked on her, and she glared at her red-headed sister. “It was great,” and yes, that was sarcasm dripping from her voice. “It lasted eight whole minutes. We get married next week.”

With a roll of her eyes, April ignored Martha’s attitude. She was used to it. They were roommates after all.

“What happened?”

“You didn’t get stood up again, did you?” River asked.

“No.” Unfortunately. “I arrived and he was waiting outside. He eyed me up and down, frowned and it got worse from there.” She was definitely deleting her dating app. “The next five minutes were spent telling me that he didn’t usually date chunky girls, and how attractive I’d be if I lost twenty pounds.”

“Jerk!” River exclaimed.

April’s fiery temper kicked in and she ground her teeth together, parting them only long enough to grind out, “Bastard.”

“You’re beautiful, Martha,” Bethany rushed to tell her. “Don’t listen to him.”

“I won’t.” But his words had wormed into her self-confidence and made her wonder if he was right. She tried to not let it impact her, but it was hurtful to hear. She wasn’t the skinniest girl in the world, but she’d always been content with what she considered to be an ordinary shaped body.

“Did you leave then?” Alex asked.

She should have, but she hadn’t wanted to be rude. “Not quite. I stuck around for another five minutes, but all he did was give me advice on nutrition and fitness, and when I ordered a burger, he told the waiter to bring me a grilled chicken salad.”

“He actually changed your order?” April asked. “While you sat there?”

River would have reacted, but she was too busy standing there with her mouth hanging open. It took Alex lifting her chin up, to have her snapping her jaw shut.

“He tried, but I didn’t let him. I said I wanted a burger, but when they brought it, he had such disgust on his face that I’d have never been able to eat it in front of him. I gave him money for it and I left.”

“Good,” River said. “He doesn’t deserve a date with a woman as beautiful as you.”

Alex nodded his agreement. “He sounds like a moron. His loss.”

It was heart-warming how they rushed to soothe her hurt feelings, but she was still deleting the stupid app when she got home. She’d have done it right then, but she didn’t want to be rude by getting her phone out.

April slipped her arm around Martha’s waist and squeezed comfortingly. “You look lovely, and that jackass was a waste of lipstick.”

“Thank you.”

“At least now you’re here for the bonfire and fireworks with us. That’s much more fun than a date with some random man.”

“You want soup, Martha?” Alex asked.

Martha shook her head. “I had my burger as I walked here. I’m going to have a toffee apple tonight though.”

“Ooh, donuts for me,” River said. “They have hot sugar donuts freshly made at the pink truck.”

It was a cold night, but Martha was wrapped up warmly inside her black woollen coat. She’d worn a dress for her date, but her tights were thick, and she and April held onto each other for warmth while Bethany went around the park taking pictures, and River and Alex stood together in a tight embrace. After a while Alex went for a walk around the park and River joined their little huddle until he returned with donuts for her and a toffee apple for Martha. She always forgot how difficult they were to eat until her face was stained with sticky red toffee like a child’s.

When the bonfire was lit, the heat wrapped around them along with the cloying aroma of smoke. She loved the smell though. Even when she was little, she’d enjoyed the festivities of bonfire night. The flames, the people, the fireworks. When she was younger it had been exciting, and now she was older, it still held the same magic for her.

Even in her twenties, she loved trying to write her name with a sparkler.

Bethany returned to them, sipping a hot chocolate, her cheeks pink from the cold, and a big grin on her face.

“The fireworks are starting soon,” she announced excitedly, her gaze already drifting up to the sky.

Her anticipation was infectious, and they all huddled together, waiting for the bursts of light to flash throughout the black sky.

When they did start the bright colours were vibrant against their dark backdrop, and the bangs made her jump, but they laughed, and they oohed and aahed at the pretty sight.

Dating strangers just wasn’t for Martha. She hadn’t enjoyed any of it. She didn’t feel comfortable, and if she was honest, she’d known nothing was going to come of it because she hadn’t felt attraction for any of them. Not even a hint of desire, and it couldn’t be that way with her mate.

No, dating wasn’t for her, but as she looked at her family, her heart was full. She had a lot in her life. She had love and laughter. She had constant joy. Things weren’t always easy, but she was happy with what she had.

April watched the fireworks with just the slightest curl to her pink lips, whereas Bethany had tipped her head right back, her teeth white from her wide grin, completely immersed in the lights above her. Her camera hung limply, forgotten.

It was the sight of River and Alex that got to her though. They were so natural together. Every act was centred on the other person without them even realising. Alex had his arms wrapped around her waist, leaning down to hear what she was saying, the soft tendrils of her blonde hair brushing his lips.

Both were smiling, but it was the tenderness as they looked at each other that stabbed Martha in the heart. This was nothing special for them, just a conversation like any other day, but it was something Martha wanted for herself.

For someone to look at her the way they looked at each other.

Her mind flashed back to when she’d approached Jeff, her date earlier in the evening and the disappointment she’d seen there.

She sighed, drawing April’s attention.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“Yeah,” she replied. “I’m good.” And she was. She’d love to find her mate, but not the way she had been. She wasn’t searching for him any longer. She’d put her faith in the goddess and have faith that he was out there. Probably pushing a pull door. He’d come when it was the right time, and until then, she had all she needed.

“I forgot to tell you,” April said. “A guy at work has a friend who manages a nightclub, and they’re hiring.”

Oh, right. She had almost all that she needed. A job would be good though. Five days ago, she’d been made redundant from the library she’d worked at for years.

“I know it’s not anything you’ve done before,” April continued, “but you said you wanted something different, and this is different.”

It was certainly that. “Late nights, loud music,” Martha said. “Might be fun.”

April pulled a card from her coat pocket and handed it over. “You just have to email your resume to the manager Mervin.”

Martha looked down at the small, white card in her hand. She’d spent a long time in the peaceful quiet of the library, that a job in a nightclub would be a shock to her senses, but it might just be a shock she needed.

“Thanks, April,” she said.

“You’re welcome.”

Fireworks exploded above her head, the smell of smoke clung to her, she was surrounded by love, and a prickling sense of anticipation washed over her.

Bonfire night was always exciting, but it was the sense of hope in the night air that had her heart kicking up its beat. The future was scary, but it was wide open. Anything could happen. Anything.

 

 

 

 

 

Wednesday 23 December 2020

A 2020 Christmas

 


This year Christmas is going to be a little different for most people, and as a single woman, it’s going to be a very quiet one for me this year. 

I’m fortunate that I am in a tier that still allows me to be with my parents on Christmas day, and as for the rest of the days around Christmas, luckily for me I’m an introvert writer with a dog and I am happy in my own company with just my furbaby at my side. Usually, anyway, but at Christmas, even I like to spend time with the people I love. Heck, this is usually my most sociable time of the year.

But not this year. To find the joy in Christmas this year, I’m making it for myself. This is what I’ve done to make it a little bit special.

 Little Festive Touches

There’s a tree, there’s tinsel, there are cosy fairy lights and candles. I’ve got Christmas pyjamas and fuzzy socks. I’ve got a fluffy blanket on the sofa. I’ve got fancy bath bombs for a lush bath, which to be honest, will be taken with a glass of wine. I’m going for a snug Christmas this year

 Food Glorious Food

You gotta have the treats at Christmas. I haven’t restricted myself at all this year. I’ve got fancy cheeses and I spent extra on hot chocolate to get fancy flavours. I’ve baked myself some treats and tonight, I’ll be making Christmas punch. I’ve got whisky and cream to make my coffees Irish. I love nice food at Christmas, and I admit, this year, I’ve gone a little extra. But I’m doing what I need to for a good festive season.

 I love Presents

I have no husband, no children yet, and my friends and I have reached the stage in our life where we don’t really buy each other gifts anymore, and dang it, I do like presents. It’s just the natural progression of life that you do get less, the older you get. So, I’ve bought them for myself. And I am excited about them. On Christmas morning, when it’s just me and my dog, (who also has a huge stocking full of gifts) I will have some surprises.

This year, I’ve ordered a couple of subscription boxes and I’ve put them aside to look at on Christmas day. I ordered two beauty ones, and a book one, and I have no idea what will be in any of them because I haven’t looked online to find out. As well as that, I ordered an Ann Summers Advent Calendar with some risqué gifts inside all of which will be opened on Christmas day.


For me it’s not about having the perfect Christmas, it’s about finding joy in the moments. Even the ones I’ve set up for myself. I don’t have the picture-perfect family, and it won’t be a Christmas Card holiday, but it will be whatever I make of it, and I’ve always loved Christmas. This year isn’t going to be any different. I’ve got treats, I’ve got books, I’ve got dogs, and I’ve got people who love me, even if I don’t get to see them, or even if we won’t all be in a room together. We’re still family and it’s still Christmas.

Beltane

My first book River’s Heart is the first of The Shadow Coven series. It’s series about a cursed coven who have finally found the goddesses f...